Phil's story

41 year old Phil, a police officer in Liverpool, came to James’ Place for help last year

“Things came to a head when my marriage broke down. Moving out of the family home, worrying about my children and work stress all got of top of me and I started to have very clear thoughts about ending my life, which to me at the time seemed to be the only rational way forward. I was very close to it, I had a plan, I had the means and I’d sorted out all my money. Luckily I was seeing a counsellor through work who realised I had a plan in place and put me on to James’ Place.

The centre was very unassuming from the outside and very welcoming inside. All the staff were lovely and my therapist was great. I’ve had counselling before but this was different, it was very focused on the crisis I was in and my therapist helped me slowly chip away at it. The cards we used really helped make sense of it all. I would take photos and go home and think about things, and work out things I could do to feel better. I remember at the end of the first session I went home and put something I had bought to end my life with in the bin, and even just doing that helped, as it interrupted the plan I had made.

At the end of all my therapy at James’ Place I had a suicide prevention plan in place. It’s saved as an email in my phone. I haven’t even opened the email, but I know what it says. Sometimes I just go and look at the email for reassurance, I like knowing it is there to keep me safe if I need it, it’s like an emergency measure, in case of fire break the glass. Without a doubt if I hadn’t been to James’ Place I would have followed through with my plan and made a serious attempt on my life. They helped me come out of the darkest place I have ever been in.”

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